How to Stop People-Pleasing (Without Becoming Cold or Selfish) People-pleasing is often misunderstood. From the outside, it can look like kindness, generosity, or being “easygoing.” But on the inside, it usually feels like anxiety, self-silencing, and the constant fear of disappointing others. If you struggle to say no, feel responsible for everyone’s emotions, or regularly put your needs last, you’re not broken — you learned to survive by staying agreeable. Many people-pleasers grew up in environments where love, safety, or approval felt conditional. Maybe conflict wasn’t allowed. Maybe you were praised for being “good,” “quiet,” or “helpful.” Over time, your ...

Journaling Prompts for Emotional Processing Journaling is often recommended as a mental health tool, but many people feel unsure where to start. Staring at a blank page can be overwhelming—especially when emotions feel intense, confusing, or hard to name. Emotional processing through journaling isn’t about writing the “right” thing or finding immediate clarity. It’s about creating space to notice, express, and make sense of what’s happening inside, at your own pace. Emotional processing means allowing yourself to experience feelings without rushing to fix, judge, or suppress them. Journaling supports this by slowing the mind, engaging the body through writing, and ...

Why New Year’s Resolutions Often Fail — What to Do Instead Every January, millions of people set New Year’s resolutions with genuine hope: This will be the year things finally change. And yet, by February, many resolutions have quietly faded, often replaced by guilt, frustration, or self-criticism. If this pattern feels familiar, you’re not alone—and it’s not a personal failure. There are solid psychological reasons why traditional resolutions so often fall apart. Why New Year’s Resolutions Don’t Stick 1. They’re based on shame, not support.Many resolutions come from an internal message of “I’m not enough as I am.” Whether it’s ...

Getting Through the Day When Everything Feels Heavy There are days when everything feels heavier than it should. Getting out of bed takes effort. Small tasks feel overwhelming. Your body may feel tired, tense, or slow, and your thoughts might sound critical or hopeless. On days like these, it’s easy to wonder what’s wrong with you—or why things that seem simple for others feel so hard. The truth is, feeling heavy is a very human experience. It’s often a sign that your nervous system, emotions, or energy reserves are under strain. Stress, grief, depression, burnout, seasonal changes, or unresolved emotional ...

Seasonal Mood Changes: How to Protect Your Mental Health As the seasons change, many people notice shifts in their mood, energy, and motivation. You might feel more tired, less focused, or emotionally heavier—even when nothing in your life has objectively changed. These experiences are common, and they don’t mean something is “wrong” with you. Seasonal transitions can affect the nervous system, biological rhythms, and emotional regulation in ways that are subtle but meaningful. Understanding what’s happening beneath the surface can help you respond with more compassion and care. Why Seasonal Transitions Affect Mental Health Changes in daylight, temperature, and daily ...

IFS Informed EMDR: Creative and Collaborative Approaches We’re thrilled to celebrate the release of a groundbreaking new book in the field of trauma therapy: IFS Informed EMDR: Creative and Collaborative Approaches. This eagerly anticipated volume brings together some of the most respected voices in Internal Family Systems (IFS) and EMDR therapy, offering clinicians a rich, practical, and integrative guide for combining these two powerful models. Featuring contributions from leaders such as Bruce Hersey, Joanne Twombly, Janina Fisher, Jenn Pagone, Zandra Bamford, Claire van den Bosch, and our very own Tina Elleman Taylor, this collaborative work represents a major milestone for therapists looking to deepen their clinical practice. Why ...

The Difference Between Coping and Avoidance It’s not always easy to tell whether you’re coping with something or simply avoiding it. Both can bring temporary relief. Both can help you survive overwhelming moments. But while coping skills help you move through difficult emotions, avoidance often keeps you stuck in them. Learning the difference is an important step in any healing process. Understanding Coping Skills Coping skills are strategies that support emotional regulation, nervous system stability, and a sense of safety. They don’t require you to push your feelings away—rather, they make it possible to experience them without becoming flooded or ...

Trauma Triggers: What They Are and How to Work With Them Most people think of a trauma trigger as something dramatic—a loud noise, a dangerous situation, or a clear reminder of a painful event. But in reality, trauma triggers are often subtle. They can hide inside everyday moments, and they tend to show up when we least expect them. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed “out of nowhere,” it might have been a trigger quietly activating your nervous system. What Exactly Is a Trauma Trigger? A trauma trigger is anything—internal or external—that reminds your mind or body of a past traumatic ...

The 5-4-3-2-1 Method: Grounding Yourself in the Moment When anxiety rises, it can feel like your mind is racing ahead while your body struggles to keep up. Thoughts become loud, your heart beats faster, and suddenly everything feels a little less steady. In these moments, grounding techniques can help bring you back into the present moment, reconnecting you with your surroundings and your sense of safety. One of the most accessible and effective grounding tools is the 5-4-3-2-1 Method—a simple sensory exercise you can practice anytime, anywhere. Grounding techniques work by anchoring your awareness to the here and now rather ...

Small Daily Habits That Support Your Mental Health When people think about improving their mental health, they often imagine big, life-changing transformations—starting therapy, switching careers, or finally taking that long-overdue break. While these larger steps matter, the truth is that mental health is shaped most deeply by the small, consistent habits you practice every day. These habits may seem simple, but they build emotional resilience, reduce stress, and create a life that feels more manageable and grounded. Here are several small, doable habits that can make a meaningful difference in your overall well-being. 1. Start Your Morning with a Moment ...

Coping with Holiday Stress: Finding Calm in Chaos As the holiday season approaches, the world around us begins to hum with energy — bright lights, festive music, endless lists, and social plans that stretch from morning coffee to late-night wrapping sessions. For many, this time of year brings joy, connection, and tradition. But for just as many others, it stirs up something different: stress, exhaustion, and emotional overload. If you’ve ever found yourself feeling more frazzled than festive, you’re not alone. The holidays can amplify existing stressors — financial pressure, family dynamics, loneliness, or the weight of expectations — making ...

Simple Grounding Techniques That Actually Work When anxiety, stress, or intrusive thoughts start to spiral, grounding techniques can bring you back to the present moment. The idea sounds simple — “just stay present” — but in practice, it can feel impossible when your mind is racing or your body is flooded with adrenaline. Grounding isn’t about forcing calm or pushing feelings away; it’s about gently anchoring yourself in now so your nervous system can begin to settle. Here are a few grounding techniques that actually work — simple, portable tools that help you reconnect to safety when you start to ...