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5 Tips for Emotional Regulation

August 4, 2025/in Therapy Techniques, calming strategies, Therapy Exercises/by New Hope Counseling

5 Tips for Emotional Regulation

Have you ever found yourself overwhelmed by emotions—snapping at a loved one, spiraling into anxiety, or shutting down completely—and thought, “Why can’t I control how I feel?” If so, you’re not alone. Emotional regulation isn’t about suppressing your feelings or pretending everything is fine. It’s about learning how to manage intense emotions in a healthy, constructive way.

Let’s explore what emotional regulation really means—and five techniques you can start using today to improve your emotional balance.

What Is Emotional Regulation?

Emotional regulation is the ability to manage your emotional responses in different situations. This doesn’t mean avoiding or denying your emotions. It means creating space between feeling and reacting—so that you can respond with intention rather than impulse.

Think of it like a pause button. Emotional regulation helps you slow down, understand what you’re feeling, and choose how to act, even when emotions run high.

Why It Matters

Unregulated emotions can lead to unhealthy coping behaviors—like lashing out, withdrawing, overthinking, or self-medicating. Over time, this takes a toll on relationships, self-esteem, and mental health. But the good news? Emotional regulation is a skill. That means you can strengthen it with practice.

1. Name the Emotion

Before you can regulate an emotion, you have to know what it is. Many people struggle with this step. Instead of saying “I’m upset,” try getting more specific: Are you frustrated? Embarrassed? Anxious? Resentful?

Use a tool like the Feelings Wheel to build emotional vocabulary. When you name the emotion accurately, you reduce its intensity—because your brain stops seeing it as a vague, looming threat.

📌 Try this: Pause and ask yourself, “What am I feeling right now? What triggered it? Is this emotion trying to tell me something?”

2. Practice Deep Breathing

When emotions surge, your body responds. Your heart races, your muscles tense, and your breath gets shallow. This is your nervous system’s fight-or-flight response kicking in.

To signal safety to your body, try deep breathing. One of the simplest methods is box breathing: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4—then repeat.

This technique calms your nervous system, making it easier to think clearly and respond rationally.

3. Use Grounding Techniques

Grounding helps bring your attention back to the present when your mind is racing. It’s especially helpful for anxiety, panic, or dissociation.

One popular method is the 5-4-3-2-1 technique:

5 things you can see
4 things you can touch
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste

This engages your senses and reconnects you with your environment, which can reduce emotional overwhelm.

4. Challenge Unhelpful Thoughts

Often, our emotional reactions are fueled by distorted thinking—like catastrophizing, black-and-white thinking, or jumping to conclusions.

Cognitive restructuring involves identifying these thoughts and gently challenging them. Ask yourself:

Is this thought 100% true?
What’s the evidence for and against it?
Is there another way to see this situation?

Over time, this can help you respond to situations with a more balanced mindset.

5. Create an “Emotional Emergency” Toolkit

Think of this as your emotional first aid kit. It might include:

A calming playlist
A journal
Affirmation cards
A favorite scent or essential oil
A list of people you can call
A note to yourself reminding you, “This feeling is temporary.”

Having a plan in place makes it easier to respond when emotions feel unmanageable.

Final Thoughts

Learning to regulate your emotions doesn’t mean you’ll never feel angry, sad, or anxious again. These are all normal, human experiences. Emotional regulation simply helps you ride the wave rather than get pulled under by it.

If you find emotional regulation especially difficult, you’re not broken—and you don’t have to figure it out alone. Working with a therapist can help you uncover what’s behind your emotional responses and give you personalized tools to navigate them.

You deserve to feel in control of your emotional world. With patience, practice, and support, it’s absolutely possible.

This post was written by New Hope Counseling.

If you’re interested in setting up an appointment with one of our Licensed Therapists, contact us at 502-712-9604.

How to Deal with Difficult Coworkers

July 28, 2025/in Coping, calming strategies, Workplace/by New Hope Counseling

How to Deal with Difficult Coworkers

Let’s face it—work is stressful enough without adding interpersonal tension to the mix. Yet almost everyone encounters a difficult coworker at some point in their career. Whether it’s someone who constantly criticizes, avoids responsibility, gossips, or simply has a negative attitude, dealing with challenging colleagues can take a serious toll on your mental health. The good news? You don’t have to let it derail your day—or your well-being.

Step 1: Get Clear on the Impact

Start by asking yourself: What exactly about this person is bothering me? Try to separate their behaviors from your emotional reaction. Instead of saying, “They make me feel small,” reframe it as, “They interrupt me in meetings, and I feel dismissed.” This small shift helps you respond based on facts, not just feelings, and gives you clarity about the specific issue at hand.

Step 2: Don’t Take It Personally

This might sound easier said than done, but difficult behavior is often more about the person doing it than the person receiving it. People bring their own insecurities, stress, and personal struggles into the workplace. When someone lashes out, it’s often a reflection of what’s happening within them—not a commentary on your worth.

One helpful question to ask yourself is: Would a calm, healthy person act this way? Likely not. That perspective alone can diffuse a lot of the tension.

Step 3: Set Boundaries (Kindly But Firmly)

Boundaries are key to preserving your emotional energy. If a coworker is constantly dumping their work on you, gossiping, or overstepping, you have a right to say something. Use clear, respectful language. For example:

“I’m not able to take that on right now, but I can help you prioritize.”
“I prefer not to discuss coworkers when they’re not here.”
“Let’s stay focused on the project.”

You don’t need to justify your boundaries. You just need to uphold them consistently.

Step 4: Regulate Your Own Emotions

Difficult people can trigger strong emotional responses. Before reacting, pause and breathe. Use grounding techniques: feel your feet on the floor, take a slow breath in and out, or count to ten. These tools help engage your rational brain and reduce the chance of saying something you’ll regret.

Consider journaling or talking to a therapist to process lingering frustration. Suppressing feelings often leads to burnout or emotional outbursts later.

Step 5: Know When to Escalate

If you’ve tried to set boundaries and the behavior continues—or crosses into harassment—it may be time to involve a supervisor or HR. Your mental health and safety are important. Document interactions if needed, and advocate for yourself with support.

Final Thoughts

You can’t always control who you work with, but you can control how you respond. With self-awareness, strong boundaries, and emotional regulation, you can protect your peace and maintain your professionalism—even in the face of difficult coworkers.

If you find yourself constantly stressed or anxious about work relationships, therapy can help you build coping skills and confidence in managing conflict. You deserve a workplace that supports your well-being.

This post was written by New Hope Counseling.

If you’re interested in setting up an appointment with one of our Licensed Therapists, contact us at 502-712-9604.

Navigating the Holiday Season: Tips for Coping and Thriving

November 12, 2024/in calming strategies, Coping/by Tina Taylor

Navigating the Holiday Season: Tips for Coping and Thriving

Ah, the holidays—a time of year synonymous with joy, family gatherings, and a whirlwind of festive activities. While it’s often painted as the “most wonderful time of the year,” the reality can be quite different for many. The holidays can bring stress, anxiety, and a myriad of emotions that may seem overwhelming. If you’re finding it hard to cope during this season, you’re not alone. Here are some tips to help you manage the holiday hustle and bustle with a bit more ease and a lot more grace.

1. Set Realistic Expectations

The holiday season can sometimes come with unrealistic expectations—whether it’s about the perfect family gathering, the ultimate gift, or a Hallmark-worthy day. Allow yourself the grace to set realistic expectations. Remember, it’s okay if everything isn’t perfect.

2. Plan Ahead

Holiday stress often stems from last-minute rushes and unplanned events. Create a schedule or a to-do list to manage your time effectively. Prioritize the most important tasks and events, and don’t be afraid to say “no” to those that you simply can’t fit in.

3. Budget Wisely

Financial stress is a common holiday stressor. Decide on a budget early in the season and stick to it. Gifts don’t have to be extravagant to be meaningful. Consider creating homemade gifts or giving the gift of time and experiences rather than material items.

4. Maintain Healthy Habits

With all the holiday parties and gatherings, it’s easy to let healthy habits slip. Aim to maintain a balanced diet, get regular exercise, and ensure you’re getting enough sleep. Taking care of your physical health can have a significant impact on your mental well-being.

5. Take Time for Yourself

It’s essential to carve out time for self-care amidst the chaos. Whether it’s reading a book, taking a long bath, or enjoying a quiet cup of tea, make sure to schedule moments just for yourself.

6. Seek Support

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to reach out for support. Whether it’s talking to a friend, joining a support group, or seeking professional help, having someone to talk to can make a world of difference.

7. Practice Mindfulness

Staying present and mindful can help manage stress and anxiety. Practice mindfulness techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga to help keep you grounded.

8. Focus on What You Can Control

There are many aspects of the holiday season that are beyond your control. Instead of dwelling on these, focus on what you can control, such as your reactions and your own happiness.

9. Create New Traditions

If old traditions bring more stress than joy, consider creating new ones. New traditions can be refreshing and can better align with your current values and lifestyle.

10. Express Gratitude

Amidst the hustle and bustle, take a moment to reflect on the positives in your life. Practicing gratitude can shift your focus from stress and negativity to appreciation and positivity.

Remember, it’s perfectly okay to acknowledge your feelings and take steps to prioritize your well-being. The holiday season is about more than just the decorations, gifts, and parties—it’s a time to find joy and peace in the moments that truly matter. Take a deep breath, be kind to yourself, and embrace the season in a way that feels right for you.

May your holiday season be filled with moments of calm, joy, and rejuvenation. Happy Holidays!

I hope these tips resonate with you and help make the holiday season a bit more manageable. If there are specific challenges you’re facing, feel free to reach out. New Hope Counseling is here to help you through the holiday season. 😊

Using Acupressure Points as a Calming and Self-help Strategy

July 2, 2024/in Acupressure, Anxiety, calming strategies, Therapy, Therapy Exercises, Therapy Techniques/by Tina Taylor

Acupressure is an adaptation of acupuncture. Acupuncture is an ancient healing intervention. Though recently western science has been able to pinpoint the ways that electricity moves within the human body, many world cultures held this knowledge intuitively. Here’s a simple analogy. Sometimes there’ is a “short” in electrical wiring. The signal doesn’t flow smoothly due to a break in connection along the way. Sometimes we might use duct-tape to keep the connection intact so that the electricity can move smoothly. It is understood that some, perhaps many, mental and physical ailments can be seen as problems with the electricity flow in the human body, problems with the electrical flow. Energy clogs or too much energy can manifest as depression, muscle aches, nausea, panic, etc. Stimulation of certain points on meridians, energy pathways, can get the electricity flowing smoothly again. Acupuncture is administered by a trained professional and uses the insertion of tiny needles into certain points on a meridian. Acupressure is the application of light touch, tapping, and/or sometimes circular movement of a finger on a certain point on a meridian. Here are some examples to try.

The Emergency Acupressure Point

You can use your dominant or your non-dominant index finger for this movement. Using your index finger, touch the back of your other hand. Put your finger between the pinky joint and the ring-finger joint where these joints meet the back of your hand. Move your finger slightly toward your wrist, about a quarter of an inch. There’s a slight groove or depression there. Leave your finger lightly touching this spot for a few seconds. Many people have reported that they feel a relaxing of the body: breathing slows down, shoulders relax, etc. You can use this in public and no one will notice. This is great for times such as: nervousness at a meeting, standing in a long line, while on the phone with someone, etc.

Knee Points

There are several points surrounding your knees. There are also several points on the many parts of your hands. Bringing these together can smooth out energy flow. When you have a couple of minutes of quiet time (really, it only takes 1-2 minutes), sit with both feet on the floor. Place your palms over and slightly at the top of your knee cap. You can feel your kneecap; it’s sort of circular. Now, drape your fingers over the top part of your lower leg. Spread your fingers out. Each finger will stimulate a point as well as a point on your palm will be stimulating a point on your knee. Hold this position for a few minutes. This position can be used in conjunction with meditation, prayer, or other mindfulness exercises.

Nausea/motion sickness points

You can spend money on pills or ‘nausea bands’ or you can learn to stimulate your acupressure points for free! Do this to find the points near your wrists. Either wrist will work. Turn your hand so that your palm is facing you. Bend/flex your wrist; you can see the wrinkles there. Place the three middle fingers of your other hand crosswise on your wrist with your ring finger at the bend. This gives you the distance from the wrist bend to the point. The tip of your index finger will be at the acupressure point. You can lightly touch this point, or you can lightly bounce your finger against the skin. Do this for a few seconds to a minute. Many people report a reduction in nausea. Also, for double the action, you can simply lay the inner surfaces of your wrists against each other so that the two points are touching each other.

Pictures of 6 pressure points that alleviate anxiety (medicalnewstoday.com)

Written by Carrie Hunter, LMFT

Carrie Hunter is a therapist at New Hope Counseling. She is a certified EMDR therapist and EMDR consultant. She specializes in working with adults who are LGBTQ, have experienced dissociation, religious trauma, or complex trauma.